Thoughts on Motherhood
“Children are not a distraction from more important work. They are the most important work.”
-C. S. Lewis
Being a mom is hard. FULL STOP.
I can’t think of a single person who would argue with that statement. Parenting is an enormous undertaking and radically changes anyone who is fortunate enough to experience it. Kids test your patience, sap your energy, and make you completely and utterly vulnerable.
Oftentimes we tend to focus on the negative aspects that accompany “mom life” in this culture more than we focus on the rewards. I am inundated on a daily basis with memes on social media depicting moms as unkempt, stressed, on the brink of a nervous breakdown, and needing a drink.
While poking fun at “mom life” has its time and place, I think we would be better served by recognizing the great commission that motherhood is. There is something beautiful in undertaking the challenge of raising children, and sacrificing yourself on a daily basis for their happiness.This is exactly what we are doing as moms. We are choosing to sacrifice our freedom, our sleep, our wealth, and our health to give our children a better life.
When we look at the life of Christ, is this not how He called us to live? He instructs us many times in the Gospel to love others, as we would love ourself. Being a mom is the quintessential example of how to do that. Every day that we wake up and endure the hardships that only those of us who are mothers understand, we are offered a glimpse at the sacrifice Jesus made for us. He gave his life for us so that we might have life. A sacrificial love that exceeds all understanding. I would argue as moms we do the same, albeit on a smaller scale, for our children.
Being a parent is one of the highest callings in life. It burns the selfishness out of a parent and, it can literally feel like burning at times. We are no longer responsible for our own happiness, but that of our little ones. We grow them, nurture them, and love them. It is laborious, tedious, and overwhelming, hard work that is thankless and often goes unnoticed leaving us feeling invisible and wondering if we are really making a difference.
However, God calls us to rejoice in the mundane. When stuck in the weeds of laundry, naps, bath time, sickness, and lack of sleep, try to focus on the blessing of it all. Rejoice and give God the glory because He sees you performing those small tasks and sees you sacrificing your life for your family. It is in these small, seemingly meaningless tasks that a sacrificial love is found, and there is no greater happiness in this world than living your life for the life of others.
This isn’t to say that you should completely neglect yourself and throw your health out the window. Quite the opposite. We need to fuel our bodies to respond to the challenge we face. Between the sleep deprivation, dealing with tantrums, picky eaters, and running kids to and from extra-curricular activities, we need to build bodies that keep us healthy and strong. Taking the time, however small, to make healthy choices for yourself is mandatory. Your kids are depending on you.
If you find yourself questioning the importance of your role, let me leave you with one more quote from the great G. K. Chesterton:
“How can it be a large career to tell other people’s children about the Rule of Three, and a small career to tell one’s own children about the universe? How can it be broad to be the same thing to everyone, and narrow to be everything to someone? No; a woman’s function is laborious, but because it is gigantic, not because it is minute. I will pity Mrs. Jones for the hugeness of her task; I will never pity her for its smallness.”